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Happiness - The Ultimate Goal
I was participating in a conference recently that included a broad range of speakers who addressed a variety of topics. Like all conferences, the quality was varied so there were times when I must admit I “switched off” and instead of listening to the presentations, occasionally reflected more generally on the themes of the event.
In essence, some were talking about success, while others talked about achievement, satisfaction, love and even wealth. As my mind wandered I asked myself - Why do people seek success? Why do some want fame and fortune? Why do many desire a loving relationship?
And then it struck me - people work towards each of these because essentially, they want to be happy. If we’re in love and feel connected then we’ll be happy. Many believe, rightly or wrongly, that if they have enough wealth they’ll secure a degree of freedom…and then happy.
As far as I’m concerned happiness is surely the Ultimate Goal!
What do you think?
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on Sunday, December 4th, 2005 at 7:24 am and is filed under Happy Tips.
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December 4th, 2005 at 9:42 pm
doc happy - I might have misinterpreted what you’ve said above but maybe it’s more correct to say that happiness should be MORE than the “ultimate goal” but the daily goal as you try to move toward a longer-term goal. If you’re working towards some achievement which will bring you happiness but which is a year away, then you’re wasting 365 potential days of happiness.
Haven’t studies on lottery winners etc shown that their happiness from the financial winnings only lasts a short term, and then they go back to the same happiness levels as they had before the winning? So the winning has given them maybe 6 - 12 months of happiness ……. then back to unhappiness.
Same goes with success. And love - how many people are busy being miserable because of what they think they’re missing out on rather than being happy with themselves.
And people should realise that there are so many different types of happiness. eg. contentment, joy, ecstacy etc. So they might just be feeling “happy” without really being aware of it.
Anyway, I’m blabbering on ……. feedback please doc happy…….
December 5th, 2005 at 7:46 pm
I’m sorry, Iolanda, but I’m not at all sure what you’re saying or if you’re asking a question. Please try to clarify and then I’ll attempt to respond.
December 6th, 2005 at 9:24 am
it’s one of the things that are easy to SAY than to type! because then you can elaborate ….
anyway, what i mean is that all the things in the above post are one-off goals, and the way that you’ve worded
“happiness is surely the Ultimate Goal!”
makes it appear like happiness is the goal that people are striving for. “goal” . singular.
but have you looked through at the meaning - the real m-e-a-n-i-n-g - of the words used? “ultimate goal” implies something you’re working towards until you achieve it. so some may be working towards “achievement, satisfaction, love and even wealth” to be happy.
achievement - one off or short term
satisfaction - as long as it’s the one task - the short term.
love - short term and long term
wealth - short term
but you can make it a “LIFE” goal instead - so that reinforces in your mind that it’s important to have it as a goal for the rest of your life. In fact I (seriously) have it as a life goal……… I did some about 8 years ago and I regularly review them.
Maybe i’ve misinterpreted what you mean doc happy - but if i had, then it still might be good for you to know as there are undoubtably many others that will have misinterpreted what you said too.
another angle - what if we just decided - just decided - to B-E- H-A-P-P-Y. not wait until we achieved something, just try to b-e- h-a-p-p-y.
the day is made up of around 960 minutes that we’re awake for. of those minutes, not many will be moments that are traditionally “happy” moments - not many will be talking to friends on the phone, eating something really yummy (better still, something sweet!) etc…. so what about all the time “waste” when we haven’t got any particular mood? eg. walking to the station/work, catching the lift to another floor at work, going and getting some stationary
why not implant a smile or just “be happy” while you’re doing those things?
anyway doc happy, as i mentioned, i might have misinterpreted what you’ve said.
December 6th, 2005 at 10:39 am
That makes a bit more sense, Iolanda, but I was really just trying to make a somewhat more simple point that all we do should be done in order to be happy (as opposed to being famous or rich).
At the same time, there’s value in the saying “each to his own”…or “what ever turns you on!”.
Happiness very definitely means different things to different people. I’ll conclude, therefore, by encouraging you all to find what makes you happy and then focusing on it.
December 21st, 2005 at 9:18 am
Curious to hear what you believe about motivating people to change.I have known positive psychology stuff for years ,but like going to a gym I find it incredibly difficult to do ,and if I do it ,difficult to maintain. Do you believe some people have to process their feelings ,old dysfunctional life scripts ,before they are able to embrace or take action on the positve . I have battled depression ,social phobia, bulimia, at verious intensities since I was 15 ,[now 41]and my life long obsession has been to find the clues and methods of changing.Or rather motivating myself to change.As for setting goals, because of not following through,I have stopped trying. I feel I still don’t know myself well,know what I want,and feel lost ,stuck,dirrectionless. Do some people need to improve threir self esteem before they can use popular positive psychology techniques ,are you aiming your technique to tweak the already happening /well functioning proffesionals? I have also read that being ‘’happy'’, is more an out come of living well ,rather than a goal in its self ?
December 21st, 2005 at 11:15 am
Hi MJ.
There’s much I could say in response to your posting but in brief, I think you’ll find answers to most of your questions in my book, “The Happiness Handbook” and/or in the making changes’ manuals available at http://www.makingchanges.com.au/products.asp.
I hope this helps.
December 28th, 2005 at 8:21 am
Found this great podcast about the philosophy of life. Very interesting and original thoughts.
http://www.podcast.net/show/70798
April 8th, 2006 at 1:54 am
Yes, Happiness is the ultimate goal, but it’s not an end in itself. Happiness is what happens often when we’re occupied in activities that are slightly demanding, artisic and requiring creativity and we probably only know we’re happy afterwards because we’ve been so busy doing the thing that makes us happy.